Tonight, I'm trying to recreate something from a few weeks ago. Same lighting, same screens, and same seating. My time here in this place is coming to a close; I'll be leaving Deerbrook Gardens. I want to make sure I use this time wisely.
Writing has changed a lot for me over the past few months. I used the board to formulate ideas for so long, that I forgot the roots of this craft: The midnight hours, the drifting thoughts, the spontaneity of melody--I forgot about this.
As of late, I've been dealing with thoughts quickly & momentously whenever it comes to milling them into song. Previously, songs would be a hollow void of melody that would be constructed, and then filled with thought and lyric. Tonight, I produced lyric, melody, and feeling all at once. Making decisions on the fly. It takes times. One has to sit, and give themselves to the process of writing.
I stopped using drugs over a year ago, and I was very interested in how my art would change because of this. I'm starting to see those differences now.
Whenever you stand in one place, it's hard to understand what it's like to be in another. Whenever I was writing Bulbs I had no idea what I was going to write about next, or even what it would even sound like. Even further, the music that I began to write immediately following Bulbs has somewhat ceased, or at least, taken back seat to these quickly ejected conclusions of my currents thoughts.
At this point, I'm closer to a new original record than not. I speaks a bit more to the thought of never know what you're going to write about. I thought I had something going, and in reality, something completely different happened. I guess that's a regular part of life.